Let’s talk about everyone’s first internet friend, Tom from MySpace! He’s a Giants fan (I knew I like him.) He even studied English and Rhetoric at UC Berkeley. Who knew?? He’s also a huge fan of Tim Lincecum, and he just offered to pay up in order for Timmy to keep pitching for the Giants. Lincicum is a free agent right now, but Tom from Myspace could be his saving grace. He wants to pay his salary if it means Tim will stay in San Francisco. Perhaps Tim has just found the best friend of all. Sidenote: After college, he was the lead singer in a band called Swank.
For all you Nickelback fan out there, I know it was a tough year for you. They cancelled a majority of their tour dates because Chad Kroeger’s delicate vocal chords needed surgery. I guess even his vocal chords are tired of his music. But that hasn’t stopped them, and I now have breaking Nickelback news: They are working on a new album. They used the Twitter to say they were working on some new stuff and they got retweeted over two thousand times! Their fanbase is going strong! They even made a little joke, saying that it’s too bad their album won’t be the best of all time, because Kanye West already declared that title for his own new album “Swish.”
The group One Million Moms have protested the Muppets, American Girl, Campbell’s Soup, Doritos, and much much more. All in the name of God and the sanctity of motherhood. But there is finally after all this time, something we and the One Million Moms can agree on: Boycotting Olive Garden. I could argue I’ve been boycotting Olive Garden all my life, but for them it’s about more than just soupy fettuccine. The new show Lucifer on Fox just premiered. It’s about a fallen angel who retires in Los Angeles to indulge in booze and women. This show is sacrilegious to the mommy group, and because Olive Garden is one of the show’s biggest sponsors, they’re done with them, too.
Superbowl commercials are coming soon, and the iconic Clydesdale horse will likely be featured in any Budweiser ads. And what’s even cooler, the Clydesdale horses are coming here!! They will be at the Budweiser factory in Fairfield starting on the 3rd, and you can even meet them and get a picture, which I fully intend on doing. But the big question is how will they top their adorable puppy/Clydesdale commercial from last year? The answer is Mac, the baby Clydesdale that was just born a day ago and is the cutest damn thing I’ve ever seen. Will Mac start his life as a child star and be featured in this year’s Superbowl commercial?? We can only hope.
Uber and Lyft has taught us the dangers of drinking and passengering. Dashcams and Uber diaries have told many tales of people throwing up, bitching out their drivers, or damaging their cars. But Uber thinks they have a solution for drunk and unruly passengers. The answer is simple: give them a bop-it. The game that never gets boring. They’ve started using it in parts of the US and their chief security officer says it’s really helping distract drivers and keep them occupied on their drunken trip home. The only catch is that the drivers will likely drive their car off a bridge after hearing hours of “bop it, pull it, twist it.”
We have breaking “brigam yoda” news, everyone! And this is about the founder of Bikram Yoga or ‘hot yoga,’ Bikram Choudhury, who is actually kind of a horrible person. Who woulda thought the guy who started the tradition of being half-naked in 106 degree heat is a total creep? He’s been accused multiple times of sexually harassing women, and now he’s just been ordered to pay $6.5 million dollars for wrongfully firing one of his female workers. The female employee was trying to investigate a sexual harassment case and he didn’t like that, so he got rid of her. Mr. Bikram Choudhury built sweaty triangle pose empire, but now says he’s bankrupt.
Muse sure loves drones. We know because they named their new album after them. And lead singer Matt Bellamy loves them so much that he’s investing in drone racing. Because where there are drones, there is drone racing, and where there is drone racing there are drone racing leagues. And Matt Bellamy is at the forefront of it all. He’s the major contributer along with other investors who have raised $8m toward the newly formed DRL (Drone Racing League).
Legos are cool. But they are way too capable these days. I guess that’s why Lego has plans to change all that. They have revealed the first mini-figurine in a wheelchair. Well, it’s the first figurine in a wheelchair that isn’t also elderly. A while back they featured an old person in a wheelchair as part of their Community People set, and people were not too happy. But this guy is rockin and rollin in a wheelchair and he’s an adult man with a grey beanie on. He’s already getting praise from the organizers of the #toylikeme campaign who say the new lego rocks their brick-built world.
Baby, baby love, love me do. There are certainly words that repeat themselves in many hit songs. But those words have changed over the years, so let’s take a look at some of the most popular hit song words and how they’ve changed over time: